Saturday, November 29, 2008

29th Nov 2008 ( Just not right )

I am back… Took less than a month for me to be back... it’s either good or bad... as simple as that… it’s either I have a lot to say… or something I want to say.. As simple as that…

Things just wasn’t right… at least that’s what I think. Life wasn’t good for me. Not sure how to express it… not going to further explain also… fast moving track… suddenly slowed down… kind of lost even though direction is so clear. This is absolutely bad…

Putting on a smile to hide troubles yet expecting people to understand… something I really wondering what am I thinking… things starting to change in all aspect… definitely not a good sign..

Fickle mind I am… lost I am... Just can’t find any words to describe my mood now days… when will uncertainty becomes certainty…

The person I thought would understand me the most failed me… the person that I needed support from crushed me…

Deep within me.. I have this fear… toward failure or what I am not sure… but this makes me to create a wall and shield to protect myself from any harmfulness.

What to do what to do… I can only have myself to blame… trusting no 1… not even those I once trusted…

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